Until someone has to make a difficult decision, he cannot understand the feeling of being torn asunder by two different options. In T.S. Elliots Murder in the Cathedral, Thomas Becket is being pulled by two compelling choices, either reconciling with King Henry or dying a martyr, both of which mask his larger concern about having the right motives when he makes a decision.
Thomass first temptation is to mend his friendship with Henry. If he does this, Thomas will regain the Chancellorship that [he] resigned (27), along with the resources of England, and will be both the Chancellor and the Archbishop, with power just slightly below that of the King and the Pope. Thomas can use this power to richlyrule for the good of the cause (28). He can also use his secular and religious positions, with their ample funding, to advance both state and Church supported goals, like protect[ing] the poor (28) and disarm[ing] the ruffian (28). Thomas has more than this earthly power tempting him to reconcile with Henry. He could again be friends with Henry and return to [the] gaiety, mirth and sportfulness (24) with the King that he had in the past; his goose will not be cooked (26). In death, Thomas will be buried in a templed tomb (27) and receive a monument of marble (27) that pays homage to his earthly accomplishments. The many benefits of making up with Henry make this scenario tempting to Thomas.
Thomas is equally torn to choose martyrdom. If he takes this path, he will gain no earthly reward, but, he will have the power to rule from the tomb (38) after being canonized. Deciding on martyrdom will lead Thomas to being the lowest on earth (39) so that he can reach the richness of heavenly grandeur (39), post mortem. In addition, he will gain the glory of the Saints (39) and have pilgrims bending the knee in supplication (39) before a shrine to him as they pray for intercession and miracles by Gods grace (39) to be performed in his name. He will also be able to make his enemies skittish because his power from the grave will condemn them to timeless torment (39) Thomas, quite literally, can hold the keys to heaven and hell (36), and help to decide the fate of both his congregants and his adversaries, posthumously. Thomas is enticed by the appeal of living with God and wielding the power of a saint.
Thomass torturous indecision conceals his bigger concern about having pure intentions when he finally makes a choice. After thorough consideration, Thomas finally chooses to die a martyr because he knows his relationship with Henry will only be a patched up affair (16) that has the kiss of peace (16). Thomas also realizes the King will never trust twice the man who has been his friend (36) and will not hesitate to exile or kill him if he fails to do anything less than exactly what Henry wants. Even after deciding that martyrdom is the right choice, Thomas must wrestle with his motives for his decision because if he becomes a martyr for the wrong reasonsa desire for power, worship, or revengehe will face, for eternity after he dies, the Void, more horrid than the active shapes of hell; emptiness, absence, separation from God (71). Conversely, should Thomas be acting for the right reasons, he should not only go to heaven but he will also strengthen the people of Canterbury and the Church. Thomas allows himself to be killed in public because he wishes to show the Priests and the Poor Women that being forced to bear witness (11) to a martyr spilling blood takes someone beyond the comfort of living and partly living (19) into an understanding of the painful truth that action is suffering and suffering action(40) and that everyone must acknowledge and consent to fate so that the pattern may subsist (41) and the wheel [of fate] may turn (41). In addition, Thomass martyrdom will mirror Christs Body and Blood (47) sacrifice and submission to fate as a redeemer. His sacrificial blood serves to remind the people of Canterbury that they live in a wholly foul (78) world that can only be purified by such blood. His martyrdom will also make the Church stronger for this action, triumphant in adversityfortified by persecution: supreme, so long as men will die for it (84). After much deliberation, Thomas ultimately decides to give his life in a way that absolves him from distress about his motivationthe uncorrupted desire to lead his congregants to a higher level of consciousness.
Thomas is tormented by two equally attractive, contradictory courses of action when he is forced to contemplate if it would be better to make peace with King Henry or to die as a martyr. Thomas realizes that Henry will never trust him in the way that he used to in their youth and so opts to die for his religion. He also has to deal with his questionable motives for his choice. He wonders if he is merely dying for want of supernatural power but finally chooses to use his death to show the unending cycle of fate and the power of sacrificial blood to clean a foul people. Until a person has to make a seemingly impossible decision, he has no way of knowing how it feels to be vexed by two competing choices.
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