What Makes an Ideal Husband in
Oscar Wildes An Ideal Husband
There are many women around the world, who as little girls, grew up dreaming about marrying Prince Charming. That tall, dark and handsome Prince, who would come rescue them from their troubles and ride them away into the sunset, where they would live happily ever after. I was one of these little girls. Now as an adult, even though I would still very much like to marry Prince Charming, I know that it is highly unlikely. Or is it? What is it about our Prince Charming that is so desirable? What is it about him that is so charming to us in the first place? What makes someone perfectly or ideally suited for us? Well, just like in Oscar Wildes An Ideal Husband, I believe that those answers differ depending on the eye of the beholder. Being perfect to one person might not necessarily mean perfection to another. Just like in the play, ideal seems to hold different meanings depending on who is being asked for the definition.
Curious as to what the words were actually supposed to mean, I first decided to look up their definitions. What is perfection? What does it mean to be ideal? Are these two sayings one in the same? Well, according to Websters Dictionary, the answer is yes. Websters defines perfect as, Having no defect or fault; flawless; accurate; absolute. While Websters definition for ideal is, A concept or imagined state of perfection; highly desirable; perfect; an ultimate objective. Now that we know what the words mean, and that they do in fact mean roughly the same thing, we need to apply that to our idea of what makes an ideal husband. So, according to the definitions, an ideal husband would be someone without defect or fault, basically flawless, perfect and thus highly desirable. But what then would be considered defects, faults or flaws? What makes one highly desirable compared to another? Is it really even possible for someone to actually be perfect? In my opinion, perfect and ideal mean two very different things. I believe that a perfect spouse would be almost impossible to find, whereas an ideal one would be much easier. Again, I believe that it all goes back to the eye of the beholder.
For example, In Wildes An Ideal Husband, the differing views of Sir Robert and Lady Chiltern are made obvious during one of their initial conversations:
SIR ROBERT CHILTERN. Gertrude, what you tell me may be true, but it
happened many years ago. It is best forgotten! Mrs.
Cheveley may have changed since then. No one
should be entirely judged by their past.
LADY CHILTERN. (sadly) Ones past is what one is. It is the only way by which
people should be judged. (Act 1. 746-751)
There is quite a difference between what Sir Robert and Lady Chiltern believe to be right when it comes to ones past. To me, this is where Lady Chilterns personal definition of ideal starts becoming clearer, and we now see the importance that ones past holds for her in particular. Further along in the same conversation she tells her husband, as well as the reader, exactly how she views him when she says:
LADY CHILTERN. Robert, that is all very well for other men, for men who treat
life simply as a sordid speculation; but not for you, Robert,
not for you. You are different. All your life you have stood
apart from others. You have never let the world soil you. To
the world, as to myself, you have been an ideal always. Oh!
be that ideal still. That great inheritance throw not away-that
tower of ivory do not destroy. Robert, men can love what is
beneath them-things unworthy, stained,dishonoured. We
Already have an account? Log In Now
4976